Friday, January 30, 2009

Mr. Yoo, your shipment of STFU has arrived

Short-fingered war criminal John Yoo wrote a clinically delusional op-ed for the Wall Street Journal the other day. Read it if you want, or just skip ahead to the fun parts where smart people take a match to it:

From Attackerman:
[I]t's closing time. Yoo doesn’t have to go home but he can’t stay here. The Bush administration is over. It’s like the old high school quarterback who’s the reliving his glory days while he’s fixing your furnace.
Dude. Get out of my house.

And Lisa Alexandrovna, whose name fills me with heady, romantic visions of incense, icons and onion-domed palaces:

The man is a liar, a coward, and now defends his illegal actions by using lies and discredited propaganda to justify the unjustifiable.
That should do it for now. You want more hurt, Yoo? Just keep flapping those DSLs.

[Thanks to Fire John Yoo for the wonderful illo!]

Thursday, January 29, 2009

Google Ads

Google Ads pushes advertisements that relate to a blogger's content. I just happened to see these two ads together, and, well, I LOL'd.

Go home to your goddamn trailer, dipshit

Hillbilly douchebag Mike Huckabee is at it again, "defending the sanctity of marriage" by comparing gay relationships to bestiality, polygamy, obesity and addiction. From the current Esquire:
Huckabee says he doesn't know if homosexuality is inborn, but he believes you can control the behavior. He compares homosexuality to obesity or alcoholism: "Some people have a predisposition to alcoholism. Does that mean they're not responsible for getting drunk? No." 

Some people have a predisposition to cousin-fucking, shit-for-brains, know-nothing, jug-band horseshit religious beliefs. Does that mean they should force them on the rest of the country? No. Go blow Jesus and get it over with already, will you Mike?

There are times when you can abbreviate a state name

And there are times when you probably should not.

[Thanks, Nate!]

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Ay carumba! Bart Simpson's Scientology robo-call

Nancy Cartwright, the voice of Bart Simpson and an OT 7, has recorded this possibly actionable robo-call message promoting her upcoming appearance at the Hollywood and Highland Center. Something tells me this video will be taken down very shortly, but enjoy it while you can.
I wish The Simpsons would soon have an episode about learning how to dive. (Isn't it obvious I'm a scuba diving aficionado?) In fact I'm a frequent visitor of Scuba List Pro, where I get information about which brands and models of scuba gears to buy. They even have reviews on diving watches for men here:  Want to know more? Ask me on

Hey, Asshole Neighbors!

You guys need to salt your parts of the sidewalk so people stop ending up like this all day. KTHXBAI!!!

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

ZOMG gay Nazis!!!!!

Kevin Abrams is straight - no, seriously! I mean, yeah, he's spent years thinking and writing about gay Nazis. But his interest is strictly professional. 

All right, so he knows all the lyrics to Cabaret. Quit confusing the issue! Kevin is really, really, really worried about gay people serving openly in the U.S. military. Dismantle the "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy, he says, and we'll be overrun by a fascist homosexual strike force. It says so in his book, The Pink Swastika.

"Certainly there would be a mass exodus of normal men from a homosexualized military," said Lively. "
And yes there would be severe morale problems for normal men forced to live as the objects of sexual interest of other men with whom they share close quarters."

Are you
 hard  scared yet? "Historically, male homosexuality was much more often associated with hyper-masculine warrior cults which were usually very brutal..."

I'm sure there was more to the story, but Kevin's voice trailed off, and he got this faraway look in his eyes, so I left him to his thoughts.

PS: I know that illustration is lame, but... well, you Google the phrase "gay Nazi" and show me an image I could have used without getting yelled at by Blogger.