Don Young Is Old

Rep. Don Young (R-AK) is pretty much that creepy dude who plays Santa Claus every year at that trashy mall in your town that's anchored by a Cato store. For some odd reason, he's yet to have been fired, and the mall never quite seems to go out of business. Anyway, he's very mad today that Uncle Ted is gonna have to watch out for a series of tubes comin' at him while in the slammer:

"You have to understand that this was not a jury of his peers. It was in Washington, D.C., which most people in Washington, D.C., don't look very favorably on the Congress because we run them. I don't know why anybody didn't bring that out. They're not a self-governing city like they say they are. We actually make decisions for them. Makes us very, very suspicious."

He is right, you know. If it were not for Grandpa Don and Uncle Ted and the 533 other assclowns making decisions for me and the rest of us rubes who live in this miserable dump, who knows what untold wonders each day would hold.