Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Memorexic!


The internationally esteemed African Press International (API, AIP, whatever), which, as with all crack news outlets in this brave new world, is run out of some dude's basement in the state of mind known as "Oslo," is claiming that they have several cassette tapes (WTF are these contraptions called 'cassette tapes'?!?) of Michelle Obama "confirming" on the "telefon" to the API basically all those bullshit chainletters your elderly relatives forwarded you on the e-mail, or some shit like that. And now they might be coming to a Fox News near you!
A final agreement has been reached between African Press International (API) and Fox News Network (USA) on the dates to air the Michelle Obama tape arising from a discussion Mrs Obama had with the API two weeks ago. The show will take place any day/time from now, with a 15 minutes alert on when it is to take place. Other programmes will be interrupted. This is a precaution taken to avoid interference from any quarter.
BUT WAIT!
Those who are close to the democratic presidential candidate must be desperate to win the elections no matter what, otherwise they would not have taken such bold step to contact API with an offer of a bribe in order to stop the airing of the tape... API has now taken a decision to contact the American Embassy in Oslo, Norway as soon as possible in order to report the matter and hand over the evidence for investigative purposes. API’s Canadian lawyer is expected to fly to Oslo shortly in order to assist in the legal matters that arise from the bribery attempt.
OH SHIT! A CANADIAN LAWYER?!? Obviously this must be some SRS BSNS.

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