Berman contends that objection to gay marriage is not simply emotional - “teh ghey makes me feel icky” - or theological – “that mean old fuck who lives in the sky is not gonna like this! And put that fucking beanie back on!” No. Gay marriage has tangible, real-world consequences. It hurts… women.
"Men, we learn from ancient Rome, will enjoy sex with other men, if there is no social censure,” Berman begins. Wait… he’s citing ancient Roman texts, and he’s not a homo? Amazing. “Now, all of this should be fine for us as well -- after all, we should let free choice and tolerance reign.”
Berman then goes on in some leering detail about a “perfumed bridegroom” and “smooth-skinned boys” – Jesus, Dave! Pull your skirt down! – and concludes that we can’t permit gay marriage because, when it comes to fucking and satisfying men, women can’t compete.
Clarification, dipshit: Women can't compete with men who want to fuck other men. In all of my 39 years I've never once wanted to fuck a dude. In fact, I've gone through Hell and back in my relentless pursuit to put my penis inside of vaginas. Not once have I wanted to put my penis inside a dude's asshole; wanted another dude to put his penis inside my asshole; wanted to suck another dude's dick; or wanted to have another dude suck my dick. Instead I endured 10 years or marriage, countless crazies, spent more money than I care to think about, and continue to pay damn near $2K a month in child support all because of one undeniable fact: I like to fuck women.
So asshole, just because you want to fuck dudes doesn't mean the rest of us do. How about this? Come out of the closet, find the biggest, most muscle-bound top daddy in town and have him rail you out like there's no tomorrow. Maybe if you're nice he'll give you a reach around while he blasts away at your balloon knot and you'll be too happy being "pleased" to write stupid shit that does no one any good. You silly cunt.